Monday, April 21, 2008

Mantra Monday: When you stop actively searching, what you’re looking for finds you.

I could have sworn that I had five umbrellas lurking in my apartment.*

I knew for certain that I had one at my desk at work. Could I find an umbrella this morning to ward off the torrential rain that has been falling for two days here in DC? No.

Similarly, for multiple weeks now, I’ve stared at my computer screen and sought the words to express all of the changes that are occurring and how to bare my heart. Maybe these changes are related to the burgeoning spring and the catharsis that comes along with the passage of time. I won’t bore you presently with a laundry list of everything changing (nor what precipitated these changes), from diet to exploration of other yoga styles, to returning to past passions, and to allowing myself to open to those emotions I have been afraid to face.

These will all become evident in their own time.

On Friday, in less than four days, I will be on a plane to London for a four day intensive workshop in AcroYoga. If you had asked me a year ago if I would be packing my suitcases (and coincidentally finding all of my umbrellas) to fly internationally to fly on the feet of those I have yet to meet, I could not have even fathomed the concept.

As I’ve said, since day one, all of this is a process of moving forward, not forcing forward, but moving with mindfulness and awareness. The players and emotions that are to play a role, present themselves in their time. Yes, I have said similar things over and over again; yet, I feel as though I’m finally beginning to gain a deeper understanding.

*In my mind lip balm falls into the same category as umbrellas - there is either paucity or a plethora.